Starting the new year off with ACTION. People who know me well know that I’ve been throwing around the idea of writing for some time, and I have a book that needs to be finished.
The problem with the book is that I feel like I’m missing out on the real-time effect I want. I’ve read things from successful people, but it’s always with a tone of reflection, which allows you to be comfortable because you know the end result. I’ve always wanted to hear from the perspective of real-time and the mixed emotions because of the uncertainty. It may just be me, but it feels more genuine.
With that being said, this is not a book, it’s a blog, and my aim is to provide short weekly posts which I’ll call “Moments of Clarity” to address various obstacles I’ve encountered and lessons I’ve learned in real-time, with the hopes that we all can benefit and learn from them.
This week the topic is few things I’ve learned from 2018.
Emotions don’t belong in business.
Every time I’ve made decisions based on emotional triggers, I’ve ultimately been on the losing (learning) side. It’s a short-sighted view and has caused me to lose sight of my main goal. Experienced people know this and will put you in a situation where you are likely to react emotionally. They’ll use your emotions against you.
In many ways, business is more mental than anything.
Remember that situations are all about perspective. A lot of times we are stuck in this maze where we feel like we have no way to get out, but there’s always a way out. I’ve found that I’m often overlooking something. It’s like Finding Waldo. Emotions cloud judgment and views and make it almost impossible to see what’s in plain sight.
If you’re someone who loves winning, fear of losing will do this to you. But a shift in perspective is all that’s needed as a remedy. Look at it as a new opportunity to learn. A new challenge.
Last year I learned this lesson the hard way. For those who don’t know, I’m a real estate agent. I had run into someone who said he had property he wanted to sell. My job was to negotiate on behalf of my client. But it turned out the person who approached me about selling the property wasn’t the owner, though he had an interest in it, and had plotted to blindside the owner into negotiating a sale.
At one point, three parties were at a property, and no one knew what was going on. The meeting’s mastermind was nowhere to be found. I reacted emotionally because I was embarrassed to have a client show up amid all this confusion. I also felt that the owners were attacking me personally, when in reality they were as confused as I was. All shortsighted and misguided views. I thought I had gained my client’s respect at least, for standing up for him and proving I wasn’t a pushover. But I had missed an opportunity. We left and had a talk, and he told me, “You think you did something there, but in reality you just blew that deal. I can’t work with you.”
At that point I realized I had lost sight of the goal.
Be accountable at all cost.
I’ve made it my goal to take find ways to be accountable, take ownership. Harvesting bad vibes hinders you from reaping the true reward from a situation, the lesson. No such thing as loss in my perspective. Its trial and error and a way to get better. It natural for our self-defense mechanisms to kick in and cause us to be the victims of situation, but this mentality puts you in a situation where you have no control of what’s happening. This means that it could happen again. Taking ownership, even of the slightest mistake gives you the control again. I compare it to driving. You can do everything right and still get in an accident because someone runs a red light. Part of the game is working on your defensive skills. Looking at situations from afar and making judgment calls. And when you make a bad call, learn from the pain and make sure you factor that experience into future situations. Doing everything right on your part is great, but the other percentage of success is managing the unpredictable.
True leaders see change and growth where others see crisis.